January 9, 2011

Love Languages

I've heard a lot about Gary Chapman's "Love Languages" books, so while we were at the Goodwill bookstore I picked up a copy for $4. I haven't read it yet, but am looking forward to it. Josh and I have already taken the quiz and this is how we came out:

Josh
10 - Words of Affirmation
"Actions don’t always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, “I love you,” are important—hearing the reasons behind that love sends your spirits skyward. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten."
07 - Physical Touch
06 - Quality Time
05 - Acts of Service
02 - Receiving Gifts

Me
10 - Quality Time
"In the vernacular of Quality Time, nothing says, “I love you,” like full, undivided attention. Being there for this type of person is critical, but really being there–with the TV off, fork and knife down, and all chores and tasks on standby–makes your significant other feel truly special and loved. Distractions, postponed dates, or the failure to listen can be especially hurtful."
10 - Physical touch
06 - Acts of Service
03 - Words of Affirmation
01 - Receiving Gifts

We both scored high on Physical Touch, "This language isn’t all about the bedroom. A person whose primary language is Physical Touch is, not surprisingly, very touchy. Hugs, pats on the back, holding hands, and thoughtful touches on the arm, shoulder, or face—they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and destructive." and we both scored low on Receiving Gifts, which is probably a good thing considering how poor we are. XD

Mine seem pretty obvious since I luuuuvs to cuddle and always ask Josh to spend quality time with me. At first I was surprised to see Josh score so high on Words of Affirmation, but now that I've thought about it it makes tons of sense. I can't see it so much in how he reacts to words of affirmation from me, as much as how he uses them to show me he loves me. From the tiny bit I've read in the book it seems we tend to show others love in the way it means the most to us.

Anyway it seems really interesting. Josh and I aren't struggling in our marriage by any means, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't use any available resource to make it even better.

1 comments:

Rebecca said...

You don't need to be struggling in your marriage to want to grow it, imo. :)
I love Five Love Languages, another awesome one is His Needs, Her Needs. I actually prefer His Needs, Her Needs, but Kevin likes Five Love Languages. We have a tradition of reading them every year around our anniversary.

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